I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I'm both gender and math confused
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
