like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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