I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.