I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Alive.
So much puke
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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