I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize