So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
my phone needs a breathalizer
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
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You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
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Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
My feet surprised me
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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