Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
