I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
