Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I am available for nakedness
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
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