Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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