hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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