great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Randomize
