the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
