$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
