Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
