If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
