Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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