Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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