I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize