no, he came in my armpit
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
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