since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Randomize
