11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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