I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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