i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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