I can text with my tongue
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize