we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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