he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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