im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize