he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
