So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
