He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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