And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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