omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
