the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize