are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Did I show you my penis last night?
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
