I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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