people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
