it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize