party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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