Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Randomize
