He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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