Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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