is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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