Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
