Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
