singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
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