it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Randomize
