this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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