I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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