Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
