is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
