there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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